Gotta' Have It

"A big screen T.V.! We need one Dad! Can we get a big screen T.V.?"

My hubby and I are on our way out the door to make a huge purchase. The washer and dryer have been showing signs of...well...not washing or drying, and we're going to go sell our souls to SEARS for a replacement set.

I have to admit: I know exactly what I want and why I want it. I have, in fact, pursuaded myself that I need a particular brand and style. Hubby agrees with me (because really, what choice does he have? Poor guy!) and today's the day we're going to sign our name to a piece of paper that says we owe Whirlpool a lot of money.

We head out to the van with our boys' half-joking request ringing in our ears: "Don't forget to bring home a BIG T.V.!"

We negotiate a washer/dryer price with a fantastic department store sales gal who happens to catch Bob eyeing the televisions. "Want to take a closer look?" she asks, innocently. We look. We want. We consider. And then my wise husband, despite the strong temptation to just lump the cost onto our already staggering bill, says we'll look into doing it another time.

In the moments that we were standing in front of those monstrous screens, we both felt like it would be a logical, even necessary, purchase. The voice in our heads said, "The kids would love this. We can pay it off. Our t.v. is, after all, pretty old and it'll die eventually."

And that gets my attention. Isn't it just a little freaky how clear ~~ how convincing ~~ that voice is in our everyday? Over the Christmas holiday this year, out of the cool, wild blue the voice said, "Ya' know. This house is really too small for my family. We should consider something a little bigger/brighter/cleaner/safer." I let that roll around in my thinker for a couple of weeks before giving myself a mental potch and a stern, "Good grief! What are you thinking about woman?!"

That voice is a sneaky thief of contentment. Satisfaction is always dependent on a nicer toaster oven or coffee maker, a more efficient vehicle, a clearer picture, a sharper sound, different clothes. Our response to the voice is disproportionate to our need.

We are ridiculously rich. Ridiculously. We have shelter, vehicles, clothing, and daily food. And we want more. I want more.

Greed will taunt me with all sorts of need-filled adjectives and good arguments about why I really must have the thing I have set my sights on. Greed is sneaky and pursuasive, but I'm on to him. I have enough. I have more than enough. I have extra ~~ enough to live, enough to share.

Bob and the boys are gaming on our old t.v. right now. They don't seem to be suffering too much eye strain and I don't see smoke coming out of the machine anywhere. I'll assume that it's good enough for the present.

But I could really use a new computer...and hardwood floors...and possibly a Blackberry...and definitely some new book shelves...